EMPTYHANDS

2006-11-23T20:30:00.000-07:00

I'm sitting in my room and am having a crisis. Just a mini one today, but really, WHAT THE HECK AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE? Sheesh. Why didn't it dawn on me before a couple of days ago that don't really know what I want to do? Seems a little cruel that it happened after the add/drop day at university, so I may have taken a semester of useless things for the sake of nothing. But maybe I will stay in Education. Maybe I'll transfer to Sciences. Or maybe I will go start an Alpaca farm in the outskirts of Edmonton. Gah... I have never been one for making quick, decisive decisions.That was the first elipse of the whole paragraph. Congrats to me.

I really should start studying for finals but it hasn't hit me how close they are. There are too many distractions floating around on the internet such as downloading season 2 of Lost. Or reading the secrets on postsecret.com.

Or here's the biggie: FACEBOOK. The life-draining, stalker-esque, highly addictive way to keep connected with your friends. Yikes. You add people as your friends, and they are organized into networks based (usually) on university/college. You can leave a 'wall post' on a friend's wall, post pictures, notes, etcetc. Creepily, you can see what your friends are posting, what groups they join, who they have added as friends, see the changes they make to their status, interests ... ad nauseum. Everything shows up in the 'newsfeed' and you are left to wonder if you have any privacy, and did it really ever exist? Dispite this, I still am addicted.

This may be one of the many reasons I have not started to study.
Another would be writing this blog.
Okay, I'll go study.

2006-11-02T23:34:00.000-07:00

Goodbye Summer

Blogging is no longer quite as in vogue as it once was. At least in the few people that I know. Anyway, I wont be using this as much from now on I think. School is wearing me down. There is too much to do, but all of the things to do seem somewhat pointless. But there are sweet things still. (not school related though)
Like............

CELL GROUP! You guys are awesome and I can tell that we will have a super great year! Wooooo woooo wooooo woooooo! GO SWEDEN! YEAAAAA

AWANA! My girls are great... funny, sometimes super rotten, but most of the time we laugh so much. Thank goodness we have our own room now.

BOOKS.. man I need to read more. What would I do without books.

FACEBOOK! Just kidding. It's a pure waste of time, yet so incredibly addicting.

FRIENDS yay for friends

ok, well there are others, and... people....or person.. but thats all that will be included on the very public blog.

Aww... i miss the bushe kids..

2006-08-23T20:54:00.000-06:00

Outside of Eliora's house

Joel driving.. before he almost tipped us haha

Peace River

picking some veggies

possibly the most random picture ever

We raced caterpillars.. the winner got eaten by Jordan

behind the youth center... what cute kids!

Destiny

Little Naomi

On the way to Assumption, 11 people/8 seater van. Jordan rode in the trunk. Naomi, Aaron, John, Joel's face, Chris' mouth.

John, Melanie, Eliora and Demi at the park! Look, they're asian gangsters.
Nathan and the kiddies.. he might be spider man, we aren't sure.
Chris and Danae getting close in the grass

Destiny and Kristen.. how much cuter can you get?

Destiny and Donovan, my son.

Group picture in the park!

okay, thats all for now... read the actual blog below

2006-08-23T20:28:00.000-06:00

STM 2006 HIGH LEVEL/BUSHE ALBERTA!!!!
Wooooooooo!!! This past week was possibly the best ever. Going into this week was insane.. and I mean insane! We weren't ready at all and our plans were completely off. We thought we would be going to run seminars on being a youth worker, and do some short vbs on the side, perhaps a visitation or two on the side. Uh nope. Seminars were not in the agenda (since no one showed up), but instead God used the preparation for the seminars in a way to equip us. It's funny, because we prayed before going to High Level for God to equip us for the trip. And of course He did.

Anyway... who went: this may make no sense...
Auntie YY or YY: our chosen leader, master of story telling and rapping.
Joel: Games man. Aka Joel Jerkface. Driver number 2
Aaron: Oh man.. aaron chow, you crack me up. Who else would suggest sleeping bag jenga?
Jordan: oh those still frame violent movies are the best...:) And who else could fit in the trunk.
Nate: Driver number 3... x about a billion. what would we all do without you? and your knitting?
Eliora: thankgoodness you came!! Besides calling Nathan weaksauce, she is suspect of wearing snowpants for pjs.
Naomi: who would be me.
Chris aka Moos: John's adopted brother, driver number 1. Black fingernails ... *flick flick, flick flick*

Well the plan was to do seminars each morning, but that was quickly thrown out the window.. so each morning we either hung around the house, drove out to assumption, went on a prayer walk.. pretty cool stuff. next comes lunch.. then comes VBS!!! My Favourite!! This is what you need energy for oh man. Each day we would drive around the Bushe reserve and pick up kids, say 15-20? and pack them as much as possible into the astro van, courtesy of Nate and Jordan. Drive back to the Bushe youth center, and play games (do you love your neighbor was a favourite), sing insane songs with nate and chris moos (he would jump around on one foot, while spinning, playing guitar and singing, and sometimes throwing in an action or two), have a story with Auntie YY, and then do crafts!! It's funny how much the kids love to bead. It was really cool to get to know those kids, and to see some of them accept Christ at the end of the week!

After VBS, it was back to the women's shelter where we stayed in High Level. Cook, eat, and then head out again to pick up the kids again and take them to the park or watch a movie. I have never enjoyed playing in a park as much as I did that week. After the park, drive them all home again, and go home and stay up till 2am fooling around and laughing.

Thats just the surface of our week, though. It was a powerful week...I saw so much of God working that week, it was insane. Answered prayers flowing in, meeting awesome people that God provided for us for encouragement (and also so we wouldnt starve..) I think the biggest thing that I saw happen this week was the JOY that we all found. Our team of 8 was a truely joyful team.. there was hardly a moment where one of us wasn't laughing our heads off, and like auntie yy said, I don't think I've ever laughed so much in one week. Auntie YY also mentioned that she doesnt think she has ever prayed so much in one week, and our team saw how powerful prayer really was.
One story: We decided to go on a prayer walk, and we prayed for the homeless of High Level. After a couple of minutes, we look around and see 4 homeless people. We say hi, start chatting and find out that one of the women's sons just got out of prison. We pray for her and ask her to come back with us to the Women's shelter for lunch and to use the phone. She agrees and we stop off at a playground to meet up with the rest of our team. We sit and she starts to tell us about her life... the hardships and struggles that shocked me.. we get a chance to really pray hard for her and with her. Through that, she experienced the power of prayer. God is good!

It's sad to be back home. I miss the kids; I think everyone does. I think we all want to go back too. Next summer.

2006-07-13T19:32:00.000-06:00

Whoa, I don't blog so much anymore. Maybe it's because my life is boring! hahaha.

The past month and a half have gone by pretty fast since Im working. Long days... long weeks.. but the pay is good, and most of the people are fun, so it's a good job. The down side: Today I got bitten. I have bite marks on my arm now.

Life has been okay and getting more normal again. I think I'm finally getting back on track with devos...meaning that devos actually exist again. Life is good, God is good and I'm sleepy! Bye!

2006-06-19T23:04:00.000-06:00

You're in a better place, I've heard a thousand times
And at least a thousand times I've rejoiced for you
But the reason why I'm broken, the reason why I cry
Is how long must I wait to be with you

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

Help me Lord cause I don't understand your ways
The reason why I wonder if I'll ever know
But, even if you showed me, the hurt would be the same
Cause I'm still here so far away from home

I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
I've never been more homesick than now

In Christ, there are no goodbyes
And in Christ, there is no end
So I'll hold onto Jesus with all that I have
To see you again
To see you again

And I close my eyes and I see your face
If home's where my heart is then I'm out of place
Lord, won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow
Won't you give me strength to make it through somehow

I've never been more homesick than now
-Mercyme

This song breaks my heart.
Pray for my family.

2006-06-07T19:52:00.000-06:00

Ohhhhh man... we're losing.... again. Poor Oilers. BUT HEY! HAVE FAITH! YEAAaaaaa....

I started my job this past Monday at a place that provides therapy and activities for autistic kids. So far I have done DANGEROUS and EXCITING things.........
....
..
....
..
FILING!!!!
Danger danger! PAPER CUTS!!
And I lied. It's not that exciting unless colour coded file folders are your thing.
But I get paid well... and the people are very nice. So I'm happy. Tired though, since it was 0-37.5 hours in one week...

Finding a job was really stressful... and sometimes I felt like giving up and just bumming all summer. But I guess I learned how to rely on God to provide, and to not give up and be a lazy bum bum. Frustrating as it is, God has his own time (which happens to be one whole month after school ends!) Heres how the story goes: didn't get the first job at a day care/camp. At the time, I was really dissapointed... Then I was offered a job at another daycare, but it was low paying and would end up being like babysitting.. So I decided not to take that one and have faith that something better would come up. And it did! Now, its good pay, good people, good experience related to what I want to do:)
............
To have faith is one thing.. but to have tangible faith: trust.. pure, concrete trust, man it is so hard sometimes... but a good lesson, I'm sure.
............

It's 5-0. My faith is gone. . But only in the Oilers.
(Just kidding)

2006-05-18T21:50:00.000-06:00

I am a bum.

I have no job. Well.. I do, but it pays not so well so I may or may not take it. I guess in the long run, it won't matter all that much how much I got paid but it seems like such a big issue now. I guess I'll sleep on it.

But ANYWAY to talk of more happy things....

YAY CEL is officially going to the philippines!! WHOOHOOO for answered prayers!!YAY JORDAN is getting a nice tan (or feverishly putting on sunscreen, depending) in the Caribbean (Not that i don't miss you ;) )!! YAY THE OILERS WON! YAY CHRIS' ankle is doing ok! YAY its freaking hot here!! (Which means i will be darker than EVER) YAY Josh met a stupid butterfly?? I dunno.. YAY my brother is almost done grade 10!! YAY my grandma is doing ok after her surgery!! hmm what else...

YAY DAVE got safely back to gp!! YAY we are going to ALBERTA BEACH!!! YAY its SLEEP OVER time at eliora's soon!! YAY ser is becoming JAPANESE at mikado! (I just tell myself that, it's not really true) YAY I got offered a job, despite pay! YAY for the boys being able to play street hockey (BUT EW because they were so sweaty...egh)!! haha jokes. YAY for Hope mission on sat!!

SOOOO... what are you YAYing about?

2006-05-10T17:20:00.000-06:00

2006-05-10T10:42:00.000-06:00

Aieeeeeeeee

So first job interview done for the summer. Hopefully the last for the summer too. Man interviews make me so nervous. This one went pretty well (I think).. it's for a day care in the west end and seems like a pretty good job! Good hours etc etc. The staff is really young too, and seem like a lot of fun. I hope I get it.

Other than that, my room is a mess and it looks like there is a person hiding in my bed. But really, its just a pile of clothes. To clean or not to clean? ..... I think I know the answer.

So David Blaine.. sick.. I bet he is very pruny right now.

2006-05-03T12:21:00.000-06:00

We are so retarded sometimes.

Girls

Guys

LS 2006

How many boys can you fit on a couch? And how many to kill Jason?

It's a RAVE!!!

How attractive... I mean the choice of wall colour

Aren't they pretty?

2006-05-02T23:45:00.000-06:00

Back from spring camp, the out of towners are gone back home.. and things seem different.

Spring Camp was amazing... So many fun times (a some really stupid yet funny times). Like:

fishing... "best catch EVER"
the bunny...hahahaha so loud
short arm pictures
gladiator.. and seeing Simon and Richie in a whole new light :)
eric's bloody toe.. sick.. and his dancing.. siiiickk
the amazing race .. "THAT WAYY" run run run.. "THAT WAY"
pillow fight... chris, jordan and eddie are crazy men Oh booo
and other things I can't think of.

On the serious side, there were some moments where you could feel God in the room. Sunsy's talks were awesome... no other way to say it really. I think Sat night broke down a lot of barriers... to see people crying out to God from the heart and to see people praying together was something that I don't think I'll ever forget... seeing what God can do just from one person's story makes you think hard. But yea, that night was tough (thanks, tho, jord, you are the bestest). Thank God for Friends!!!! What amazing support we have, guys, in LS!

Leading praise turned out to be such a blessing (and a good experience). Josh and Eddie started us out great, followed by Noel and Eliora. It's really neat to see how differently the two teams lead, but how effective both were. Haha its like you learn in kindergarten how everyone is unique and special! heehee Sweeet. I was so nervous to lead... I woke up sunday morning and was like "ohhhh mannnn I have to lead worship... crap" But somehow God took away all the nervousness (cuz sometimes i shake) and just gave me calm. And man, if I didn't have Jordan playing with me, there would have been a lot of empty spaces with no guitar..lol.

And now we are back in Edmonton... and it's so sad cuz everyone is leaving!! Josh and Jasmine yesterday.. Tammy and Noel today.. and Jason (who I think was embarrassed that we alll came to the airport with him), and Fiona later this week. So sad. See you all in four months!!!!!

Well, pictures are coming later. And now.. the job hunt is on. Sick.

2006-04-24T19:20:00.000-06:00

my heart by paramore

i am finding out that maybe i was wrong
that ive fallen down and i cant do this alone
stay with me
this is what i need please

sing us a song
and we'll sing it back to you
we could sing our own
but what would it be without you

i am nothing now
and its been so long
since ive heard a sound
the sound of my only hope
this time i will be listening

sing us a song
and we'll sing it back to you
we could sing our own
but what would it be without you

this heart, it beats
beats for only you

my heart is yours


mmm good song.  From such a young band too.. makes me jealous.  I love the chorus...
Sing us a song, God, and we will sing back to you as perfectly as we can. 
So often we get caught up in our own melodies that we forget the one 
composer who is everything. What would the song be without you, God?

2006-04-21T21:20:00.000-06:00

So uh. hockey, eh?

I just watched a hockey game, and I don't usually watch them. Or even care. Or know what an icing call is.
It was the first playoff game for the Oilers (in Detroit), and unfortunately they lost (but it was freaking close). What makes it even more strange is that it was only me and my mom watching, and we were getting kinda into it too. Usually, we are the ones rolling our eyes when we can hear my dad shouting at the tv, hoping the players will hear him all the way at sky reach. Guess what... we were yelling this time (but not racously or anything..)

Anyway, I will not yet call myself a convert to hockeyism... I attribute my interest tonight to accute procrastination from studying psychology. Oh man.

2006-04-18T19:36:00.000-06:00

Night is nice.

2006-04-14T01:30:00.000-06:00

.............................................
...............................
..................
........
...
.

The eyes, they aren't real.
The look, they crease in smiles. But they aren't real.
They look happy.
But they aren't real.

Things are falling into place, but then they slip
right through.
Why are all the pieces blue, when they aren't supposed to be.
It's not even real.

It's the reflection that blinds the most.
Really, all I see are blue and black bruises,
in your mirror.
Get me through the looking glass,
Because if you don't let me in,
I might vanish.

.
...
........
...............
..........................

Songs are hard to write... and this isn't really one anyways. I guess it has some real meaning, and maybe you will understand. If you don't, thats a-ok too. It's just that we place so many walls around us, and when you get a glimpse inside, sometimes you get pushed right back out again. I care. And I won't stop. So let me in.

Something I just learned though: It's is a conjuction of it is, and its is possessive. I've been doing it wrong this whole time.

2006-04-13T18:53:00.000-06:00

I am watching Gilmore Girls right now. It is really amazing how fast they can talk and still manage to breathe.

I didn't get anything done today. It's a little depressing. I should also find a job. Thats also depressing. I also still haven't picked my spring camp songs. There is now a dancing and singing grape on tv now. And now talking hands. I think we waste a lot of time watching commercials. Imagine all of the stupid things we buy just because we saw it on tv. Oh look. now its Kate Moss selling mascara on a motor bike. Intareeeesting.

There is this show on tv called look alike where people get made up to look like some celebrity. I saw this one once where this girl was made to look like Paris Hilton and it turns out that she eventually acted like her too. Talk about role models. Our obsession with celebrities is pretty strange when you think about it. We don't know any of these people, yet we want to know everything about them.. you know, see where they eat, what shampoo they use.

Ok enough. Time to watch Anna and the King. Hahahaha oh man.. waste my time.

2006-04-08T23:35:00.000-06:00

"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven." - Matthew 5: 13-16.

Do I have salt, Lord? Do I have flavor?
Do I preserve, or do I take down with my weakness?
Do I encourage? Am I Different for you or for myself?
Do I have the right ingredients that you require?
Or do I taste bland.

Am I a light for you,
or do I contribute to the dimmness and shades of gray?
Do I conform to the patterns around me,
or have I been transformed?

Do I believe that your will is good, pleasing and perfect?
Or do I only see it only as the consolation?
Do I believe your awesome grace is undeserved?
That by your mercy, Lord, we are spared?

Make me yours, God. Make me yours.
Make me your salt, Lord, to be used.
I am yours, God. I am yours.
May I be joyful for you.

2006-04-02T17:48:00.000-06:00

This past week has been a mix of everything. Some awesomely good times and some incredibly low points. I guess I'll start with the bad part which coincidently happened first. My family found out last saturday that my Ba-chan (or grandma) had a pretty serious stroke. She lives pretty far away, so its especially difficult not being able to go see her. My mom flew out to go see her, but it seems so hopeless when I cant do anything myself. Im stuck here. When something like this happens, it makes you wake up and see the fragility of life. Really, life is a gift, but it can be gone in a split second. So whoever reads this blog (haha I only know of probably ... 4 for sure? or more due to blog stalkers!!), please keep my grandma and my family in your prayers. Prayer works in mysterious ways, no?

Its funny, though, how God gives you little things here and there to let you know He is there... like encouragement from friends.. prayers .. all the good stuff. Thanks guys.. means a lot! It also doesnt hurt to have hot pot and disney feast on a friday night with a whole pile of good friends, right? man.. who knew shopping could take so long. The majority of the time was spent in the car due to the insane traffic jam on whitemud west. eek. I know we tend to gripe about traffic accidents and how horribly inconvenient they are.. but I'm sure in the majority of cases, our inconvenience is far less than any injury that the people involved may have had... so the next time I am tempted to swear about the traffic jam on the whitemud, I'll stop myself and think: hey. Im blessed. Im safe in my car.

well.. my parents are gone for a few more days.. PARTY AT MY HOUSE! joking. dont even think about it. I suppose me and my brother will have to survive on 3 packages of skittles, leftover meatballs from hotpot, and yogurt for now. Or I could go grocery shopping. hmm...

Probably the most people my kitchen has ever held.

Happy happiness. Minus a bit of happiness because I am sadly not in the picture.

Two Disney movies makes a person tired. Right Jason? Lover of all things Disney???!!!

2006-03-25T11:51:00.000-07:00

Ahhhhhh.... Photoshop is so lovely. For some reason it is very satisfying to make a new banner. Well, I haven't blogged for a while but first I would like to say, "HI MOM", because she reads my blog. Interesting. haha. I guess I won't write about all the devious crimes I commit on a regular basis anymore. Or how when I clean the bathroom, I never clean behind the toilet because its gross, or how I wear her gloves. Just kidding. This will be a short blog because I have to go to school now. Bye!

2006-03-02T22:38:00.000-07:00

I've never done Lent before because I didn't really know what it was...this year I thought I would try it out. I thought about it alot, of what to give up, but I couldn't really think of anything that would be useful. Or that I wouldn't die to give up. Like msn. Good on ya chris for giving up msn.. impressive. Maybe next year, when I'm braver or something. Anyways, I was hoping that the good ol' web would provide me with some answers so I googled "Things to give up for Lent"... and found a silly site about giving up sending chain letter-emails and to stop going to gun shows... I guess if i committed to that, I wouldn't face much temptation anyways so it would be a relatively smooth ride. I could give up chocolate even though I was supposed to give that up a loooong time ago (although I secretly drink hot chocolate once in a while.. like last night) oops.

Then I read that you can add something to your life instead of giving something up so I've decided to do devos every day. Pathetic. Because I should be doing this anyways, but I'm not, so I'll try to make it a habit. Hopefully by the end of the 40 days, I'll have a good system going and I can lent it up all year long!

On a side note, the word lent reminds me of lentils.

2006-02-26T20:00:00.000-07:00

WHOAAAA my stomach hurts. Too much laughing.
SO... guess what guys. ALMOND JOY is a chocolate bar, not a figment of Josh's imagination that I believe in. OKAY? Good. Here is some proof:http://www.hersheys.com/products/details/almondjoy.asp

By Hershey: Almond Joy candy bar: If "sometimes you feel like a nut", grab this classic treat of almonds and sweetened coconut dipped in milk chocolate.
And I think you can ride a camel any way you want.

2006-02-23T23:06:00.000-07:00

FINALLY! Edmonton has snow! (Although not much, me and Amy were still happy!) So we decided to make a snowman in the dry pond!

Unfortunately for us, the snow was very uncooperative, and didnt stick together very well. The snowball stayed roughly this size for a very very long time.

Oh look. Its a touch bigger.

Amy, the gymnast that she is, does the splits! Wheeee! While making a snowball! Double wheee!

Hes much shorter than anticipated. We kinda ran out of snow. His name is Baby because Amy kept talking to the snowballs and calling it Baby.

Afterwards, we had a picture taking fiesta.

2006-02-21T11:45:00.000-07:00

Ski trip was great!!!

This year, I wasn't as crazy excited as I was last year, but once we got things going, it was so much fun! Day one, we drove down to Jasper in the greyhound bus... watched A Bug's Life for the millionth time, and Shrek 2. (Hadn't seen that one yet... BUT OH MAN... inside jokes forever.) I shared a room with Noel, Tammy, Ashley, and Josephine, which was all good, and cool to get to know them better. Yay Noel for the long guitar session! Haha I bet the guys were getting annoyed with us.

Day two! YEA snowboarding time! Chickened out on the insane powder cliff... I didn't feel like dying just yet... and overall, after day two, didnt feel too sore! I think stretching does wonders, despite Jordan calling it Weak sauce. By the way, everyone is saying 'weak sauce' now. wow. Follow the leader is the best game to play, especially in merging areas... Day two was also the day of KFC time. We ordered in, and then realised that we had no plates or cutlery... and they didnt give us any. They also forgot to bring us a third of our chicken, so they came back and brought us brownies too! What service! It was a pretty fun time, and I made interesting sushi... coleslaw, fries and gravy, all wrapped in chicken skin... which I think could clog an artery in 30 seconds..

Day three was the best.... we had around 15-18 ppl snowboarding/skiing in the group.. man.. gets a little congested at times. But super fun! Thanks to ppl who made me do hard stuff! Otherwise me and Chris would have stuck with greens all day long. Too bad we couldn't have stayed a bit longer... Bus ride home was.. tiring. Good though. They played a really horrible hobbit movie, really really loudly for a long time. It had this high, quavery singing Bilbo Baggins, which really gets to you when you're trying to sleep.

Anyways, that was ski trip 2006.

2006-01-25T23:49:00.000-07:00

MEXICOOOO
I'm slow with posting pictures... but here are some.

Nuevo Vallarta Beach... ACTION SHOT WOOOO! This took many tries.

Some nice beachy shells and rocks... there were so many on the beaches, and we collected a ton. AND THEN we found out that you arent supposed to, and that the customs officials would search your suitcases and confiscate them. So guess what. I hid them in my socks. I am now a smuggler.

A nice, random tree.

A nice random little boy. He was very cute.

There were tons of pigeons flying over us.

We took a jeep ride to a very beautiful beach, where we had luch and relaxed... we also found a dead puffer fish on the beach.

Even in Mexico, we manage to be hicks.

There were beautiful sunsets almost every evening.

Me and my brother, Evan.

My family on the boat of death. We went whale watching and snorkling, which would have been fun IF me and my brother didn't get sea sick. I think I threw up 3 times. Good to know, right?

In Puerto Vallarta, with my parents' friends from their church. This was the day of extreme bargaining mania. It was a little frightening.

2006-01-01T23:40:00.000-07:00

Happy New Years! My, my, my... this has been a fun filled break from uni so far! Christmas was nice and relaxing (and our choir singing went... well enough. haha.) Its been fun hanging out with friends and watching tons of movies. And skating, although that activity tends to be hard on the knees. New Years was a little boring because I was home all by myself... although made much better by phone calls haha... BUT THE BEST IS YET TO COME! because I am going to......

MEXICO!
YEA. I leave tomorrow morning and arrive in Puerto Vallarta 5 hours later. I am looking forward to some great sunshine and lovely sandy beaches! I'll probably come back looking extremely dark... but oh well. One thing that I am most looking forward to, besides the swimming and sunshine, is taking pictures!! I haven't had the time in a while now, and I think Mexico will provide some wonderful scenery. Hopefully, soon after I get back, I'll have some pretty pics to post. Until then, I'm sorry to leave you with only text.

2005-12-19T22:35:00.000-07:00

YEA YEA YEA YEA YEA YEA YEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAA
DONE EXAMS!
Ok, i have a question. For example, a picture of a spider's web + a picture of piece of mail = web mail. Example two: A picture of a star + a picture of a fish = starfish.
WHAT DOES A PICTURE OF A CAT + THE LETTER 'R' + A PICTURE OF A RING WITH A DIAMOND MEAN?? Stupid linguistics.

Besides exams, today was fun. We took some nice antifreeze pictures in the Ed building. (Some of which are absolutely hilarious, but I will not be posting them... because .... yea.) But here are two.
Aaron is happy that hockey is back.

Yea... Microwar?

2005-12-16T22:30:00.000-07:00

Two down... two to go! Studying is so stressful sometimes... especially when it's for a subject that isnt your best, and you are behind in the class. Oh dear.. integrals are horrid. HORRID!

But the upside ia that I've been studying at the university this past week in lovely Ed north. In the lovely ls room, with the lovely ls people! Its actually been a lot of fun, aside from the actual studying part. Its funny... studying with all the lsers makes me study more and I get distracted less. I think its all the tension in the air, and all the brains hard at work.... catchy. From this past week we've learned (besides our actual exam material) that:

- Ho ho's is worth your money. Because you can eat it forever, or warm it up the next day (but not in the styrofoam container because you will get cancer.)
- Its hilarious when people sing to their headphone music and not realise it. At least I think it is.
- We like to steal tables.
- Hide and go seek in the dark (in lecture theatres) is fun. But you may get run over. Or get rug burn. Or get stuck between a row of seats and the wall.
- Some people can study forever. Impressive.
- Some people like to take lots of showers!! hehe
- earphones can electrically shock you in the ear.
- You can fit many many people into a small room in education north.
- DND means do not disturb. Not Dungeons and Dragons.
- FOREVER!

2005-12-06T18:57:00.000-07:00

N A R N I A! YES!
Ohhh man, I'm so excited for this movie! I've watched the trailers so many times, but each time they get better and better. (especially the 9 min one) I probably won't go for opening night when its super crowded... but I dont think i can wait for too too long. *sigh*

I think my favourite character will be Lucy. (she was my favourite in the book) The girl who plays her is so cute... and just has those quirks that make her adorable. *sigh#2* i cant wait!

well, thats it for the very short blog.

2005-11-30T23:17:00.000-07:00

GUESS WHAT! I quit my job! YES!
Finally, I am free from retail. No more customers who mess up the very neat piles of clothing three seconds after I finish folding them! No more working closing shifts and overnight floor sets! No more lugging around naked mannequins (which are, by the way, really awkward to undress... its just weird.. like a person without a head... adn you are taking off their clothes)

Im relieved. Things were getting too busy and I needed a break. Only downside is no more discount. But believe me, Ill live.

Read something interesting today from a book called "the life you've always wanted"....
Most people want to live a balanced life. Don't be a workaholic and obsess over your career... make sure you get enough exercise... use your finances properly... and voila, you've created for yourself a well balanced life. Happy?

Well maybe not. "At a deeper level", the author states, "the paradigm of balance simply doesn't capture the sense of compelling urgency worthy of human devotion... It lacks the notion that my life is to be given to something bigger than myself." Pretty cool stuff. Despite what we may believe, we aren't the center of attention in the grand scheme of God's Glory. Instead of aiming for a well balanced life, how about a well ordered heart? Order your heart around HIM and only Him. Order your life around Him and only Him. Easy to say, not so easy to accomplish. But lets try! OKAY!

2005-11-23T19:48:00.000-07:00

I love my heater. I just might die without him.

My Dad, enjoys saving energy, and is sometimes a little fanatical about it. He says he conscientious, but it can get a little ridiculous. To him, saving energy means turning down the heat so low that sometimes it would be warmer to stand outside. "Put on a sweater! Why do you wear such thin clothing???" Well, I may as well just wear a ski jacket and some gloves, which I did once, while i was typing on msn. My conversations turned out to be "jheruy! hoiwer aer uyoiiuo?" etc etc.

BUT!!! BUT NOW I HAVE FOUND MY DARLING... MY DEAREST HEATER. He may be old (yes, its a he) and make strange vibrating noises, but my oh my, its hot in here! I love him in a completely platonic way in case you were worried. Sometimes, I think that maybe that electrical cord shouldn't be getting that hot, and that no, maybe it isnt fine that the lights go dim everytime hes on. But hey. Im warm. And thats all that counts. Until of course, I start an electrical fire in my room. That might be a little too warm.

2005-11-19T00:28:00.000-07:00

MMM DRIED MANGO. COSTCO BABY!
Anyway, haven't blogged for a while... because I am too busy? Maybe. Lots has happened these past few weeks. I finished in class driving lessons where I learned how to properly hit a moose, and that you should always check under your car for bad men/women before getting in, because they may want to grab your ankles. Actually, I think there are probably more efficient ways to steal a car/purse/person than by ankle grabbing. But hey, caution never hurt anyone... too badly.

Things are better.. in other areas. I HATE MISUNDERSTANDINGS by the way. I'm sure most do. I'm also sure they are bound to happen, until we all get better at communicating. Ill work at that. And at being completely honest. Its hard sometimes when you aren't sure what the other person is thinking, or that you aren't sure if saying whats on your mind will hurt. Them or you. In the end, its harder to keep it in though.

These past week I've found myself thankful for prayer. In the past, I've really taken it for granted... only to be used in times of need and heartache. But I have come to learn that I should commit everything and anything to prayer. It is such a relief sometimes to just lift it all up to God; who better to fully understand us than he who made us, right? I dunno, I guess I really just felt this overwhelming sense of peace yesterday. I was at Taylor for the praise night... (which was really nice... quiet, but focused.. ) and his peace and mercy washed over me... emotionally it was like this need to cry and let everything that has been pressing on my heart out. Haha i guess a few tears escaped... anyway... its nice to know that He is always there.

Oh, and another thing. I've also come to realise that I am completely self centered in prayer. which i am working to change. My first thought after "dear god" usually has something to do with God, please help me... God please help this person.. etc etc. Who am I to ask God for all of these things without thanking him for his countless blessings and praising Him in all his glory? Sheesh, if i ask my parents for things all the time, and never say thankyou, I'm sure they would get annoyed. Although.. God is different in the sense that He is so humble... Hes willing to accept us in our times of need, even when we ignore him other times. i guess some lyrics to a song reminded me of all this... "You will increase, I will decrease, Lord". So God, thank you for your faithfulness, your mercy, your grace. Thank you for not ignoring me, even when i ignore you. Thank you for infinite wisdom, your unfailing love. You are so awesome God! Thank you for answered prayers, for guidance in things I could never do without you. Thank you for sending your son to save me, God. Amen.

2005-10-26T22:25:00.000-06:00

When the mighty rivers flow I see You

With every drop of rain Your grace in view

In all of creation your glory's shown

But only in my heart do You call home

And I worship You, I worship You

For only in my heart do you call home

Keeper of my heart, faithfully see

This air of praise your children bring

This picture reminds me of summer... when everything was smooth sailing and I thought everything was going to turn out as planned. There isn't much to complain about now,though. Its just that 'life' is confusing, and things that I thought were a for-sure, aren't so certain anymore. New things turn up. Maybe for the better? Mighty rivers flow... I guess I'll just have to float along His current and see what He has in mind.

2005-09-25T17:36:00.000-06:00

I like fall so here are more peekchures. If you don't like fall, cover your eyes.

The ravine is almost right behind my house so its strange that I don't go back there more often. But I decided to today. Perfect weather... however I forgot to charge my camera battery, so after 5 min, the little flashing red battery sign pops up.. and then kaput. My camera is dead. BUT... thankfully someone told me that if you warm up the battery, it will keep working. So i did, and voila.. i could take pictures for 15 min more. (between spurts of rubbing the battery and breathing on it. Lesson: either charge your battery before, or have very warm hands.)

2005-09-23T23:10:00.000-06:00

LS Camp 2005

Walk in the Woods

Fall Goodness...

Our Creepy Tipi

This deer is a little moldy

2005-09-20T13:02:00.000-06:00

Its fall. Did you know? Perhaps not officially, but who really cares. I love fall, but I love two things the most. The trees (of course!) and the sky. Both conveniently depicted in this photo that I took at camp. By the way, the majority of the 'good' pictures that I take are unintentional... meaning I don't actually have any photographic talent, just good luck and good weather. And handy photoshop skills.

Anyways, fall means back to school... back to some structure in my life which seems to dissapear during the summer... its good though because in a way its a new beginning. I'm determined to do well this semester... but not everything is about school. This summer really made me realise some other priorities that I ought to have... ones that are so easy to just put off until later. I tend to put off spending time with God... which is a stupid thing, but you know.. its easy to do. If you dont study at school, you will get a concrete reminder (in the form of a 1.0 average and a notice that you are kicked out of school and now have mucho free time.) But if you don't study the subject of God + you, you won't get a letter in the mail telling you, "hey! Get off your butt and spend some time with me!" I'm sure eventually you might notice a difference in your life... or maybe you won't. Which is the scary part.

I think at camp some of the 'talks' reminded me that we have to intentionally use our God given time to pursue Him. We can't just sit back and occasionally read the bible and expect life changing truths to suddenly make us better christians. Nice, but no. It has to become a habit... something that we work towards daily. I almost wish I had done a year of bible school or something before going to uni... but oh well. Maybe later on, if it all works into His plan.

Anyways... lets talk about something incredibly exciting.... like... BUYING THINGS! justkidding.. I think i spend too much money on stuff i dont need. (although, compared to other people, i dont spend that much.. i dont think. Plus it takes me forever to decide whether or not to buy something. My parents said they would buy me a camera for christmas and it took me 6 months to decided which one.) But.. there are two things that I would really like to spend some moolah on right about now.
1. Guitar: acoustic.. with a pickup.. etc etc. My lefty is getting annoying... and sometimes i want to smash it. JK I would never smash an instrument. It always makes me angry to see music videos where they smash guitars and dance around and act angsty. Use computer generated effects, and then give the saved guitar to me.

2. Laptop: because taking notes in class by hand is a pain in the .... hand. Eg. right now i am retyping my sociology notes because i cant really read them. And its boring.

SO thats all. Plus i need some new socks. Time for note typing. Bye.

2005-09-14T22:32:00.000-06:00

OH MAN..... I'M IN UNI!
Yikes, where does the time go? Its as if only yesterday I was wandering around my very large highschool, trying to find my history classroom... and now it really was yesterday that I was wandering around trying to find my sociology lecture hall. I found it. And was early. By HALF AN HOUR... so i had sat and ate my sandwich... and tried not to look like an eager first year.

Anyways, university is a whole different world. Or rather, its like a whole different city. Afterall, it has its own government, places to eat, shop (for text books.. but still), places to live, read/sleep etc etc. So therefore, in my books, its a city. So far, im not a contributing member to society because i havent joined any clubs. Eventually i will join the ski club, but that isnt to make the world a better place... thats only to get discounts. But still.. its something.

One thing ive noticed is that you dont have to know how to necessarily teach to be a prof. An unfortunate fact for the student who has to sit in a boring lecture about soil properties, but hey, what can you do. TRANSFER OUT! Its my answer to everything.

But yes, this should be an exciting year... I'm actually more excited about next year when ill be in the program that i want... but this year im excited for mainly church stuffs. Like Awana (my girls are great! so far.. hehe), and ls.. just because its new, and... other stuff. Im not being ambiguous about the 'other stuff'. I just dont know what else this year will have in store. AND SHOCK OF ALL HORRORS: bsb isnt so bad. I'm also techinically challenged when it comes to computers

2005-08-28T22:36:00.000-06:00

Hands will infinitely amaze me. They contain so much character... really, they tell the story of a person's life. Think about it. Hands are used ever day in almost everything we do, whether we like doing it or not. We start out with tiny, smooth, perfectly formed hands and as we age they get older, wrinkled and creased and veiny. When I asked my grandparents if I could take a picture of their hands, their response was always a look of "what in the world" and said "but my hands are so.... old!" Yes, of course they are old and weathered ... But to me, they are the most beautiful. All of these hands are related to me and soon, when I have some time, I'll add my 'hand'. I think these are some of my favourite pictures that I have taken just simply because they actually have personal meaning. Hands will infinitely amaze me.

2005-08-27T22:09:00.000-06:00

WOOHOO ITS A BANNER

2005-08-15T12:42:00.000-06:00

Camping was quite a blast ... despite it being a little soggy at times. The drive up was smooth and we occupied ourselves by playing 20 questions and listening to Russel Peters... oh the accents... *sigh*. Anyways, tent-setting-up was rather uneventful and easy, to my surprise.. for some reason i thought it was a complicated process but i guess not.

but this is trivial stuff.. moving on. Lets talk about my feet! "YES!" you say, "I LOVE FEET!" jk. But anyways, we did two hikes.. 24 km in all i believe.. and the result: a "strained achilles", so says the russian medicenter doctor. Not the most glamorous of injuries, or glamorous way of getting it.. (my shoes are bad).. but whatever. I can walk fine.. but I cannot shovel dirt.. hahahaha.. ha.

Overall, the camping trip was a nice relief from busy, polluted city life. (and my city isn't even that busy or polluted..) At night, the darkness is so overwhelming and enveloping... it completely overtakes you. But i like it. Some people were freaked out at night just because it was so dark.. but i was kinda comforted by it. Sometimes when im with a ton of people, i still feel lonely.. but in the dark, you know you are the only one supposed to be in that place and you are content to feel that way. I guess its God's way of showing us that He is always there, even in total darkness. Thats something that i learned... God is always with us and is the only person who will never hurt us.. will never leave us. Too many times i get disappointed by the people around me.. but God never disappoints.

But back to God's provision.. and his guidance.. i had to do a morning devotional thinger.. lovely stuff since i don't particularity enjoy public speaking. i was nervous.. and usually when i get nervous i speak too fast etc etc... but i dunno.. i just felt that God placed a calm spirit within me so that i was completely comfortable... and im not saying that the devo was any good... but i felt God's calming presence...interesting. I think its a lot easier to feel God when you are surrounded by his beautiful creations. I'm not just saying 'beautiful' because we are so often told that all of His creations are beautiful... During this camping trip I was in awe of God's wonderful works.. especially at Rawson Lake. This huge Mountain sort of hugged the side of the blue blue lake.. and the the grass and trees were so incredibly green that the colours were almost too much to look at... wow.. to think that God put so much care into creating such scenery for us to enjoy.. imagine how much care he puts into creating us and just how much his love means... His majesty and his power is just so evident everywhere you look and its hard to stick with the belief that such magnificent views could be the result of only pressurized rock and evolutionary trends. man.. its hard to be an atheist in the Rockies!

God blessed us with good weather for that one hike to Rawson lake... God truly does provide!! And you know, sometimes i think that God only cares about the big, significant, world-changing kind of things... but contrary to this belief, He gives us the perfect weather for an insignificant hike for a bunch of high schoolers and junior highs... i will continue to be delighted and surprised by God's marvelous works.

I think my most favourite part of this whole trip was singing around the camp fire.... hahah i love to sing.. me and my brother used to make up ridiculously stupid songs and harmonize horribly to them. Now that i think about it, i dont think the words we used were actually english.. or any other internationally recognizable language. Gibberish, yet fun. Anyways, there is something about praising God outdoors that just gets to your heart. Infectious. Maybe God can hear us better because our songs go straight up to the night sky. Just kidding.

Well, im off.. to bed and montreal.

2005-08-06T19:33:00.000-06:00

The ncem kiddies

crazy crazy week.. yikes.. but i must say pretty darn fun. (most of it at least)

most of the week was spent helping out at vbs. I expected it to be exactly like the 'chinese' one a couple weeks ago but.. i dunno this week was so much more fun... but also so much more meaningful... i dunno how to explain. First of all, the kids were awesome!! most of them were missionary kids, so the way they have grown up is completely different from the spoiled way that we are used to. The kids were from all over western canada.... some as far as the NWT and Yukon.. crazy stuff. I guess being raised in such a remote place forces you to rely so much more on God. Here in the city, its an 'option' to not have to think about God and what his will is for you simply because we have everything we need.. plus a ton more. But up in the mission field i guess there is so much confronting you at all times that the only way to live is to centre your life around God. but then again, my life here should reflect the 'missionary lifestyle' anyways.. no exceptions or excuses.

hmm what else.. well the kids were sooooooooo cute! I know i shouldnt pick favorites.. but of course i had mine.. actually, 3 of them were in the same family... sigh.. so adorable. A little three year old, kept wanting to use my camera.. so he ended up taking pictures of ppls knees, the gym floor.. his nose.. etcetc.. haha...

One family had 7 kids! all home schooled. Man, their mom must be amazing. This whole vbs, being with kids 24/7, has really reaffirmed for me the whole idea of becoming a teacher... and also put into my mind the possibility of becoming a teacher/missionary... if thats possible.. but who knows. cool stuff.

the whole week wasnt all fun though.. stuff happened that hurt a lot... i dunno.. confused right now.. dont really know what to think. im not angry or anything tho.. just.. kinda hurting and slightly disappointed. Oh well.. crap happens to everyone.

but.. to end on a high note... CAMPING IS IN 2 DAYS!! WOOOOOOOO.. i hope we can manage to cook properly so we dont die. but yea.. so excited.. should be lots of fun.

2005-08-02T12:43:00.000-06:00

Well, its time to start a blog. Why? Just because. This should be interesting...

I never really understood the point of blogging. Say you keep a diary and your diary has a lock. Of course you will keep that diary secure or hidden, which ever is more convenient... and quite possibly the worst thing that could happen is that someone happens to find it and reads everything. Your secrets are out and to prevent further humiliation you chuck your diary in the nearest garbage can. I guess this is kinda like me.. although i think or hope im less paranoid but i could never manage to keep a diary for more than a week. I would look back and read entries and think, "what the heck, i sound like a stupid retard."

"BUT," you say, "you are keeping a blog for everyone to read." Yea well good for me. I can always delete it... but I don't think i will. Hopefully you won't be bored.

Anyways, it seems that everything is changing now... uni starting soon eek! and everything else is turning upside down... but not in a bad way necessarily... just that things are different, people are different and i guess my attitude is different too. But that can be for another BLOG! night.